CUBA DUPA

Throughout the Wellington region, approximately thirty women make breakfast for themselves, children, dog and husband (in that order) as they hum an old favourite tune from an era that "you weren't even born in". If you were the dog, watching them from your food bowl, one might be confused. Why does human lift their knees up on the way to the food, and then nearly drops said food due to punches and knee lifting and talking that is not directed at me. Oh, you realise, they must simply be getting rid of a cockroach.

But it's still going, and they're smiling. And it's no longer humming, it's singing. Or panting. You can't tell which. Your human bends her knees, breakfast is slopped into bowl, and she doesn't care. Because she is no longer your human. She is breathing very heavily. Yep. That's right. You guessed it. She is Nick Carter. And Britney Spears. And Kate Bush. It's weird. Now she is leaping and stretching - it's very bizarre - but you are interested (and THAT is why we don't let people watch our classes) 😉

This is what we imagine most of us did on the morning leading up to our performance, anyway. The ultimate bucket list 'to do.' Officially complete.

Do a flashmob ✔️

We were under strict instruction from Clair to all meet but avoid eye contact with other neon or lycra clad individuals - and should you want to tell a fellow member of the flashmob you see in passing on the street that you like their lipstick - god forbid! Be subtle about it. Please. Better yet, hold it in and pretend you're an unassuming member of the public who simply over dressed for this very warm day and refuses to take off a layer. We must not reveal ourselves as said neon and lycra clad individuals. Well, unfortunately, Abby nearly ruined that with her nerves as she couldn't stop herself from pacing and talking to EVERYONE. Nearly gave away our identity. Everyone else? You did a 👌🏻S P E C T A C U L A R job. Well done.

Fortunately, at 1.45pm SHARP, our favourite Napolean Dynamite banger comes on and our lady in metallic pink - Rewa - begins, and the public form an organic circle around her (slash Clair claps them out of the way as she counts to time and hollers - once an instructor, always an instructor). It is off to a phenomenal start as about 87% of the crowd are filming this on their phones, with the remaining 13% being forced to watch the performance through someone else's phone because the phone is in the way #2018belike

Shall we summarise our flashmob at Cuba Dupa? Moments such as Ailua holding her ear as though she's got an ear piece for her live performance of Oops I Did It Again, Kelsey slinking into the mob as she whisks off her outer layers to reveal a double denim outfit that only dreams are made of, and Lesa giving a sly wink followed by an inappropriate pelvic thrust at a very confused member of the public will hopefully summarise the performance for you. If you missed it, or need the visuals (of course you do), watch the video below. OR, follow us on social media (facebook or instagram) or subscribe to our newsletter where we'll be posting an official/professional quality video of the show.

Want a flashmob for hire? Yeah, 'cause um, we'll be available.

Shut Up & Dance